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Somehow, I won again. Weird!Then came the Copper Valley Stage Race. After winning the time trial, I got to wear the leader's jersey, which I thought would feel like an honor and a privilege. Not so. Wearing that damn shirt is more like being dunked in soda and shoved in a beehive. Everyone's out to get you, and if you don't have any teammates to help with drafting, chasing and setting the pace, then the leader's jersey means you're Adidas Superstar Classic
It'll be f ing cool, though. And in an effort to find a fuel efficient, ozone friendly method of public transportation, I am working on a secret machine that is part ski lift and part Black Hawk helicopter. It's called the Chairhawk, and it runs on an ethanol derived from junk mail andBAM! I crash into my training partner's wheel at a stop sign and fall over. Mens Adidas Superstar Metal Toe
gadgets and written amendments to the Constitution while out on a six hour ride. For example, I've decreed that all members of Congress, the president of the United States and his cabinet should be required to get on a treadmill or stationary bike for 30 minutes before passing any new law or declaring any war. Let that pesky testosterone settle down a bit. They should have this exercise equipment lined up right there in those hoity toity wood paneled chambers. I've also invented a new reality TV show called "Turn It Off," in which 10 reality TV show producers are placed on an iceberg with a female polar bear and its awfully curious cub. The last producer standing wins a prize, but I'm not sure what yet. Maybe an Oldsmobile. Or a trip to Acapulco.
like a near death cycling experience (a short loop consisting of lots of speed, lots of corners, lots of women who have no problem throwing elbows).
in for a world of hurt. The other women will do what it take.
A few f bombs and I'm OK. Better than the time I was hit by a car and Adidas Superstar Olive Suede went all Starsky and Hutch over the hood. That hurt for a few days. Then I raced Valley of the Sun, a three day stage race in Phoenix consisting of a time trial, a road race and a criterium, which is kind of Adidas Superstar Black And White Outfit